Close your eyes, and imagine Philadelphia without the Phillies. Picture a city without a franchise known as the doormat to the National League. Ponder what this town would be like with a winning ballclub -- an apparition in itself.
Well, the bigwigs on the fourth floor of Veterans Stadium provided Philadelphians with temporary relief by firing manager Terry Francona on Sunday afternoon after four abysmal seasons of Phillies baseball. No doubt the public-relations office will spin the hiring of Francona's successor as the next step toward delivering this team to the Promised Land.
Forget that the last three managers -- Francona, Jim Fregosi, and Nick Leyva -- carry a combined .460 winning percentage.
Wouldn't it be nice to take this team and ship it on the first El to Siberia?
Unfortunately, there are people in this town who don't agree with such an idea. In fact, there are those who actually care for a team that claims to play a variation of the popular American sport of baseball.
Brian Simon, a Feltonville resident, is an avid baseball junkie. Although the mention of the Sillies makes him cringe, the thought of losing his hometown ballclub is a thought he'd rather not fathom.
"They're our hometown team," Simon said. "I can't imagine Philadelphia without a baseball team. I wouldn't want that."
Larry Glauser, a Bell's Corner resident, concurs with Simon. "You can't fault them for trying."
Added Lance Sugarman, who works at Sports Collectibles on Bustleton Avenue: "I'll be a Phillies fan until the day I die. But if they move, I would follow the old team. I wouldn't care about the new team."
Has it occurred to Philadelphia that sitting through a Sillies (spelled correctly) game is the equivalent to enduring a Gomer Pyle U.S.M.C. marathon in fast-forward (or in normal speed, for that matter)? After a while, it becomes sickening to watch.
Since 1883, the beloved red-pinstripers have captured one world championship (1980), five National League crowns (1915, '50, '80, '83 and '93) and 71 losing seasons -- with their current streak of futility dating back to the strike-shortened 1994 campaign.
In a town starved for a championship, the insatiable desire for Philadelphia to witness a winner is becoming unbearable.
When do the blind loyalists have the right to throw their hands into the air and give up? For the sake of those who endured rhetoric about off-season progress, only to see it disintegrate into cow manure, the Sillies should move.
The number of poor decisions under the Bill Giles regime -- and current president Dave Montgomery -- are staggering, if not depressing. For every mention of the acquisitions of "Wheeze Kids" Tony Perez and Joe Morgan for the '83 title run, the names of such busts as Lance Parrish, Ken Howell, and Greg Jeffries echo louder than an AC/DC concert in a vacant church.
And lest we forget the Patton-like strategy in trading for Andy Ashby -- whose numbers weren't too impressive during his first stint in Philadelphia in the early '90s -- and shipping him to Atlanta when a rocky performance and a contract impasse forced the team's hand.
Drafts have been lackluster, at best. J.D. Drew was selected by the Phils although he spoke out against coming to Philadelphia.
And after the reception he received as a visiting Cardinal in 1999, who could blame him?
Pitcher Tyler Green was drafted amid much hoopla in 1991 after his college manager blew out the young prospect's arm during that year's college world series.
Wayne Gomes? Enough said.
And wouldn't it have been nice to see what Frank Thomas looked like in a Sillies uniform instead of Jeff Jackson.? Oh, never mind. Thomas wouldn't have liked Reading.
There is some validity to Glauser's point about effort. Free-agent signings verify the Sillies' attempt to improve their wretched situation. Unfortunately for general manager Ed Wade, he is strapped by the shallow wallets of the "silent partners."
Locking in Mike Jackson last season, and Jeff Brantley a year earlier, appeared to be proper decisions. But Brantley pulled up lame early last season and missed the duration; Jackson nursed a should injury and did not toss a pitch in a regular-season inning for the Sillies this year.
Some may feel the Sillies are cursed with bad luck. All the more reason to hit the bricks. Besides, no one twisted their arms in signing 35- and 36-year-old closers in consecutive years.
"It seems ridiculous," Glauser added, referring to any suggestion that the team should move. "Why not turn the Phillies into a good team? At least there's a bunch of young guys in place."
Fans are pleased with the progress of young talents like Scott Rolen, a former rookie of the year; Mike Lieberthal, a two-time all-star; Bobby Abreu, a consistent .300 hitter; and Pat Burrell, a rookie with tremendous potential.
However, there is an individual in the Northeast willing to part ways with this franchise. John Fafara, a Lawndale resident, played minor-league baseball in the St. Louis Cardinals organization from 1953 to 1958. With his love for the game tarnished by today's salary structure, Fafara favors a divorce from the Sillies. However, he understands why fans are hesitant about a move.
Fafara said that baseball fans from his era remember when the Philadelphia Athletics -- now in Oakland -- moved to Kansas City in 1954. "Back then, the A's were the better of the two teams in this city. People were devastated when they left," he recalled.
Furthermore, people recall the success the Sillies gained in 1980 and 1993, Fafara added. He thinks the success of a few good years enables fans to live with such painful memories as the collapse of '64 and other failed seasons.
Unless people show their disapproval of the organization, the situation will remain the same. Selling the team is not an option.
A breakup would do both parties good. Sure, some fans would be hurt. But there are more productive things to accomplish that don't require watching a team lose 90 games . . . again.
The Sillies will find a home, and the city will replace them.
As the fifth-largest media market in the country, the time span between ballclubs won't be as extensive as this team's tumultuous history.
In the meantime, fans can satisfy their urge for the diamond with treks to Trenton or Wilmington. It's cheaper, and the product on the field will still resemble a minor-league franchise.